It has been a very rough week. I went from being an active mama and wife to being completely unable to care for myself in a matter of a week. My hyperemesis has hit with a vengeance. I spent Sunday night in the ER being rehydrated after days of unrelenting vomiting and an inability to hold anything down. After making it home after 1 am, we were back at the doctor at 9am to begin the process of home health care. I had to have an emergency ultrasound to make sure the baby was safe. We were blessed to hear that strong little heartbeat and I was overwhelmed by that sound. Next was the surgery to place my PICC line. We finally arrived back home for good after 5. It was amazing how the Lord granted strength to get through such a long day, but I had a great deal of pain throughout the evening from the surgery with no ability to manage pain since nothing stays down. So there were some pretty dark hours I felt like giving up in. The vomiting does not cease in the nighttime hours, so I struggle to get any sleep. But morning has come and with it, a small amount of relief, a little less pain and a few hours void of the constant wretching. Matt is home today to meet my new nurse and learn how to care for the PICC line and infusion I will be getting round the clock. It helps a great deal to have him hear. The kids of course have pitched in a great deal, but are struggling for sure. They struggle in different ways especially depending on their ages. This is the part I hate the most. Sometimes I wish I could hide all of it from them. I know it scares them, I see it, and even though they have been through it before, it is still hard. Life just gets a major upset. It was hard to even figure out when to get groceries in the middle of all of it. So 10pm last night, Matt finally got out for some. Madi has taken on a partnership with Matt in making the list as well as seeing to all of the laundry and much of the care of the little ones. They are a good team. Cole is my comic and tries to make me laugh, which I hate to admit, but it doesn't come easy. And he is also the one that holds down the fort every time Matt and I need to be gone. Joslyn is the easy going,"it's going to be ok" one, but also super sensitive to always making sure to come and give me a kiss,rub my back and just make sure I am not alone. Bell is in a unique age, able to not understand completely and be able to play with Noah like nothing has changed, but does have those moments when it hits pretty hard and she just really needs to crawl in bed with me and cuddle. She fell asleep in my arms last night after a good amount of tears. And Noah, he is just curious about it all and not too fazed by it. He is another good cuddler which I am grateful for. And Matt, well, he is just amazing. The amount he takes on is overwhelming but he does it with such grace and care.
There you have it, a little view into the life of an HG pregnancy. It may be a little too real and raw, so I apologize. The weeks ahead seem so very long, but I know there is an end with a super sweet blessing;) May the Lord bless all of you this Christmas season and be your strength for the difficult passages you may be going through!